Why I am a racist, and you are too.

Imagine a bunch of Italian Americans sitting around a large dining room table with a million different food items spread out in front of them: A big bowl of bread, a giant 10L bottle of olive oil, two different kinds of pasta, a large salad, which no one is eating. A bowl of meatballs, a bigger...
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Why Your Relationship Sucks & How To Make It Work

I am just going to say this from the start. You may not like this blog.  It is going to be in your face a bit and if you don’t like the word fuck, stop reading now.  I don’t care if it is offensive, because it needs to be said. Today’s relationship...
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My Code Of Conduct: 10 Behaviors Of An Enviable Man

The last few years have not been easy ones for me. I lost my way. I got distracted.  I chased all the wrong things and trusted all the wrong people.  I did not completely live up to the man I have always wanted to be. I had no defined code of conduct. But then that is life and...
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Gossip. The Relationship Killer….Or Not?

“I can’t believe you are sitting around talking shit about me!” “What?” I said. “I would never do that. I was sticking up for you. I would never let someone disparage you. Anytime I have heard anyone say something about you, I came to your defense.” This...
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Shame, Guilt And The Way Back

I am not presently seeing any life-coaching clients. It’s a good thing too, because I have been deeply involved in coaching with three of my friends who are going through issues in their personal romantic lives. These people are close to me and I know will be reading this blog. In fact,...
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Our Stories: Why We Have Them And Where They Come From

We humans operate from groups of stories we have told ourselves over the years. These stories control us in almost every way because they define how we see the world, and our place in it. Ironically, very few of these stories were actually authored by us. Instead they were unconsciously adopted...
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How To Be Productive. Know Your Ultradian Rhythms

Do you know what an ultradian rhythm is? it is the natural fluctuation in your energy batteries through the day. We humans have periods of time where we are capable of high energy output and focus, but we also have time periods where our battery charge is much lower. This is called the ultradian...
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The Morpheus Effect: Change Yourself To Change The World

I am sitting at the dining room table with my mother and father and 3 siblings.  I am probably six years old.  My two brothers, Kimo and Keoni, are 11 and 9.  My sister Jodi is 8.  I don’t know what the conversation is about, but the message my mother...
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Distance, Persistence and Resistance: How to Handle Psychological Sabotage.

Let’s say you’re talking to a friend or family member. Someone close to you. A person you love dearly. Through the conversation, something just feels wrong.  In fact, let’s say it often feels wrong with this particular person. You tell them how you feel about them....
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How To Find Your Passion? Create It Instead

When I was in high school I remember having a conversation with my father. He and my mother had just discovered that I had missed over 50 days of school my junior year. He was distraught, to say the least, although he and my mom (mostly my mom) covered for me with the school, so I did not get in...
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