The Six Powers of Change with Josh Trent - Episode 42

Josh Trent, host of the top-ranked Wellness Force Radio podcast, joins Jade to discuss the six powers of change. Longtime friend of the show, Josh returns to discuss what a Next Level Human is compared to a Culture Level Human, the toxic construct of faking it rather than being it, and how we can improve society through horizontal hierarchies rather than vertical hierarchies.

Connect w/ Josh @trent_sd 

 

Want to read the discussion? Check out the transcript below...

Jade:    [01:17] Alright, welcome to show everyone. Today, I am with my boy Josh Trent. We’ll get to that in just a second, but I wanted to give you a little bit of background on Josh, and this conversation in particular. You know, one of the things I’m trying to do with the podcast is just capture some of the real conversations that I get to have with some of my close friends. This is one of these conversations that Josh and I just wanted to capture, and decided we were both going to put it up on our respective podcasts. Josh is one of my favorite people to talk to because he just has a breadth of knowledge in the space of personal development, and he and I both come from the same background – personal training, personal development, he’s steeped in philosophy like me. We just have the most interesting conversations. And if you don’t know Josh, you want to check him out on his Wellness Force podcast. He’s one of the guys that kind of pushed me to basically do the podcast, and has helped me work through some of the issues around the podcast as well. You’ll get a great sense of him through the conversation if you don’t know him; otherwise, go and find him on Instagram and on his own podcast, @wellnessforce on Instagram, @trent_sd on Instagram, and also, you can get him on the Civilized Caveman as well. That’s his company too. Enjoy the conversation!

 

            [02:46] One of the things Josh said to me when we just hooked up - he came up to visit in L.A. because he has some stuff here – and he made a comment to me; he said, “You know, if you’re not here to do good, then what the hell are you doing here?” And I had the same kind of thought you have; I’m like, if we’re not here to help, then why are we on this planet? And that, to me, is what Next Level Human is all about. It’s about that idea that you can exist, and you can kind of be here for your kids, or show up for your job, or love your parents, or all that kind of stuff – but what are you doing for Team Human, and how are you making a difference? Not legacy in the idea that, you know, ego-based legacy, like I want someone to remember Jade Teta because of all the things I’ve done and I want you to remember me after I’m gone. It’s more that I want to make a difference in the world and know that when I’m gone, I contributed to the greater good, whether or not anyone recognizes it or acknowledges it at all. That’s about being a next level human.

 

Josh:    [03:53] It’s such an amazing metaphor too, because everybody’s trying, in the personal development world, be your best self. You know, who are you becoming? There’s all these catchphrases and whatnot. But it’s pretty self-explanatory to me, man. Next level human. The next level, what is that exactly, the next level of being a human?

 

Jade:    [04:08] Yeah, and you know what? It’s not higher level for a very important reason. You and I talked about it’s not higher level, because higher level says I’m better than you. I don’t know if you know – you know Carl Jung, right, and Freud – most of know those two. Well, the other big guy in that, the first 3 of the major psychologists, was Adler. And Adler, Adlerian psychology, says this – it says we should look for not vertical hierarchies, but horizontal hierarchies. What that means is essentially this: most people think, I’m above you and I want to keep you down, or maybe I’ll bring you up to me, or maybe you’re above me and I’m reaching to get to you. We have this idea, but the horizontal hierarchy is maybe that you’re on the football field, and you’re on the 80-yard line and I’m on the 20-yard line, but on the soccer field, I’m on the 90 and you’re on the 10. In other words, each of us humans has something uniquely beautiful to contribute on this planet. Everybody has that no matter what domain that they’re in, so there is no higher level human; there’s just the next level human. Where are you on your education? Like, there’s things that you and only you can teach me.

 

Josh:    [05:19] And vice versa.

 

Jade:    [05:20] And vice versa. We go out on a street here in Los Angeles, and you will find people out on the street who will teach you things that you could not possibly know without running into them. So, each of us are contributing something to the world. Part of what I believe is that ownership about what we contribute is one of the most important things we need to do as we mature as humans, and that’s part of the path of the next level human.

 

Josh:    [05:46] You gave me the book… when did that book come out?

 

Jade:    [05:49] Which one? The Human 365?

 

Josh:    [05:50] Uh-huh, the Human 365.

 

Jade:    [05:51] That came out February. It was supposed to come out January, but it’s like - I’m always behind!

 

Josh:    [05:57] It has almost like a choose your own philosophy adventure element to it, where nobody has to read it start to finish. I mean, they can if they want to, but they can flip to a section that resonates with them. I like that about it. And we were talking yesterday about these core principles, like if you’re going to be a human, but you get to do 4 things really, really well. What are these 4 things, man?

 

Jade:    [06:17] Yeah. The 4 jobs of every human: we must earn and manage money. You and I were talking about the idea, there’s 3 aspects to that: you gotta earn, you gotta save, you gotta manage. And I was telling you, I’ve been really good at earning and really shitty at managing and saving. But we have to do that job. And some people cringe at that a little bit because they’re like, I don’t like it being about money, but we have to make a living. Everyone has to make a living. So, that’s job 1. Job #2 is health and fitness, which is something you and I have been involved with for a long time. It’s sort of been our bread and butter of the work that we do. Health and fitness, we must attain and maintain our health. Can’t do anything else if we’re sick. Then there’s personal relationships, and that has to do with our family and our friends, and our romantic partners, and our social tribe.

 

Josh:    [07:06] Would you throw children in there as well?

 

Jade:    [07:08] Absolutely. This is where we manage all those social interactions. We humans are not islands unto ourselves. We are social creatures above all else. We can function without other humans, so we have to manage that aspect. Then, the final one, which is what you and I talk about a lot when we’re together, is the idea of purpose and meaning. This gets into the mental, emotional, spiritual realm of things. We must feel like we matter and we’re making a difference. Those 4 jobs are non-negotiable. The funny thing is nobody teaches these. We need mentors. Like, I need you, and people like you to educate me in those areas that I have not – I can’t get a degree in it. I gotta go, for example, one of the things that Josh is helping me with is I want to go down and start to explore some of these things with the plant medicines that I can only get from you to facilitate that for me, that growth. Just like there’s things that you can only get from someone like me, but we can’t get it in school. To me, these 4 jobs are imperative. We all must do these 4 things, and a lot of us, honestly, are failing at one or more. I know I am.

 

Josh:    [08:20] Well, ‘cause these 4 things, there’s a constant balance with all of these. It’s like, have you ever seen somebody juggle plates or pans or something? That’s kind of what these 4 things feel like in our lives at some point, and I felt this for sure where maybe my health and fitness was strong, but then my finances were weak. Then, in the past year, I’ve been really focused on money, but then my health and fitness kind of suffered a little bit; and now I’m like dating this lady and it’s beautiful, and that category is being filled, the relationship category, but then another category will kind of suffer; and I feel like these 4 cups are being filled and emptied at all fucking times.

 

Jade:    [08:52] It’s like being on one of those stools, right, where you’re shifting back and forth, and all 4 legs are never on the ground at the same time. It’s like you’re kind of moving around. It feels like that, and I agree with you, but as we get sort of more in our rhythm and our maturity as we grow, I think that idea of juggling those should be getting better. It’s just that what a lot of people do, they just essentially don’t even put in the work or settle in a particular area. For example, I know a lot of people - and I know you do as well because we talked about this – I know a lot of guys who just go, their whole thing is relationship oriented. All they do is put all their emphasis on a romantic relationship, and they let the financial job suffer, and the health and fitness job suffer, and then, of course, every human is looking at every other human. My theory on this, and tell me what you think about this, but I think we subconsciously, as humans, look at others and say how well are they doing their 4 jobs. Then, especially in a romantic partner, that romantic partner’s going to be like, well, if you can’t do your 4 jobs well, that makes me have a harder time to do my 4 jobs, and everything feels shaky. I feel like, in a sense, that’s why these relationships often times will sort of dissipate, and then, what happens? All of a sudden, you go, oh, now I can focus on my 4 jobs again. You get back in shape, you make a little bit more money, but then you get in another relationship and the whole thing falls down again. And this is the game we often play.

 

Josh:    [10:20] This is the game, man, and I feel like, you know what’s the undercurrent of all 4 of these things, is there is a enjoyment and maybe a hedonistic, or just like being in the happiness and the enjoyment of life as well. These 4 things are very important, and also so is enjoying that these 4 things exist and enjoying the process too. Like, that’s as equally important as this. Because I feel like maybe all these are 4 pillars that sit on a foundation of connection, joy, happiness, fulfillment. Like, it’s kind of all in the same bedrock in a way. This is what it feels like to me.

 

Jade:    [10:51] Well, yeah. So, let me ask you this. This is just an interesting thing. Let’s take finances, for example. Do you feel like when you’re making more money and have no financial stress that you feel more happy and fulfilled?

 

Josh:    [11:03] Absolutely.

 

Jade:    [11:04] Right, and so do I. That’s one of these things where it’s like, alright. And when your health and fitness is in order, do you feel more energetic, more confident to go out and talk to people and/or even to work on your business?

 

Josh:    [11:18] Go to the beach and take the shirt off. That too. Everything. All that stuff is a hell yes.

 

Jade:    [11:22] So, I would agree with you then that, to me, I feel it’s the same way, when you are tapped into these different things, you have a much easier time feeling happier, centered, more enjoy, more fulfilled, because you know you’ve taken care of these basic things that every human has to do. Now, of course, we all – every single one of us – suffer in one or more of these areas at any one time, and most of us are struggling with all 4. There’s nothing wrong with that, but being a next level human is about saying ok, let me be aware of these 4 jobs. Let me, #2, look and be honest about how well I’m doing them, and then let me grow and learn to get better at them, because if I can’t do my 4 jobs, I can’t contribute fully my gifts to team human.

 

Josh:    [12:08] Yeah, you know what? The 4th category, the 4th pillar, like if men specifically – and I can only speak from this because I have a man’s mind and I’m in a man’s body – but for men specifically, I’ve heard this from many, many people that lecture, there’s even a TEDx about this, where the 2nd leading cause, I believe, of death in the UK is men that have lost their brotherhood. It’s men that are actually suffering with loneliness above the age of, I think, 40 or 50. It’s the 2nd leading cause. You would think it’d be something else. But I think about this 4th pillar you’ve designed, purpose, legacy, fulfillment. If that’s not in place for the masculine, for men specifically, there’s trouble in the waters. Because then, where’s the motivation to even fulfill the other 3 if that 4th one isn’t solid?

 

Jade:    [12:52] It’s funny, I love talking about the whole male thing with you. Because one of the things I always tell Josh, and I think people should know it’s really interesting, is - I know he coaches me a lot on this – but I have this thing with where we are in the male space right now. We were talking about this, and I think Josh has a little bit more, he’s more balanced in this regard, but I’ll share my opinion on this, and some of you will agree or disagree; and then I want to get Josh’s input on this. But, my opinion is we’re in this weird place where we have on the one hand, we got the sort of old school, I’m a male, I’m going to peacock around, I’m going to flex my muscles, I’m going to win. I want to win and just beat you, basically.

 

Josh:    [13:32] This is like John Wayne, basically.

 

Jade:    [13:34] The John Wayne male. Exactly. And you see this in the bravado of someone like a Donald Trump, let’s say. There’s this cockiness and arrogance and way of being. Then, on the other side of things, in the new age world – if we want to say new age or spiritual realm – there’s these men that show up a lot like the feminine. Maybe too much, where they’re always talking about their feelings, and they’re always talking about the idea that we need to be in our feminine and be more balanced, and I agree 100%, but this to me over here, this John Wayne guy seems contrived and inauthentic, and toxic in a sense. And this over here feels weak and a little wishy-washy and mushy to me as a man. It almost feels like we’re missing something. To me, I like the idea of marrying that sort of warrior mentality - that I take care of my job, and do my shit, and I’m ready to win and be ambitious and charge forward and stand on the front lines – and marry it a little bit more with the ability, not defaulting to, but the ability to open up, and talking about emotions, and be vulnerable, and things like that, but not to live in either one of these states. I’m not so sure that’s healthy. You know what I think, man? That’s what I want to get your opinion on. I really think that we lose the nuance when we’re talking about men. To me, a strong man is a man who is neither of these things, but both, and knows when to pull them out. Knows when to shut the hell up and do their job and be the warrior, and also knows when to open up, share their feelings, and be the healer, instead of living in – I’m mixed up when you start living in either one of these too much. I just want to hear your thoughts because you have the best thoughts on this.

 

Josh:    [15:20] Well, dude, they have their own unique pole, don’t they? We live in duality all the time. In your living room, there’s a yin yang, right? Right in your living room. That is actually the metaphor of this masculine/feminine, John Wayne vs. the spiritual white robe dude that eats vegan at Encinitas 24/7.

 

Jade:    [15:35] Exactly.

 

Josh:    [15:36] So, there is extremes to any category, and there’s an extreme in the category of the older kind of mindset masculine, where it’s the strong, Gary Cooper, silent type. They didn’t express emotion and women had their place, but there’s also in that category, there’s also that warrior heart and that warrior spirit. So, to delete one category would not be really positive for either one. Then, on the other side, there’s the flowy, kind of new age, spiritual, I’m going to talk about my emotions all the time, I’m going to process my emotions with my lady, and that can tend to turn women off. I would think if you really asked a woman point blank, do you like it when your man is oversharing, over expressive, processing with you, I would say that most of them would say absolutely not, because there is this balance. It’s a polarity issue. David Deida talks about the polarity between men and women. With this polarity, it’s literally like a battery. If you connect a negative cable on a battery, power starts to flow through it, and that’s what actually drives the car. But if you have two negative poles, or two positive poles, there’d be no charge. So, the old school masculine, they definitely had that charge. They created the polarity. The new school masculine, they can create that polarity too because sometimes men, depending on the situation of life, it is time, and it does have a proper context to go there with your woman, to be in a space of connection, open-heartedness, or even vulnerability, which the old school masculine doesn’t even like that term.

 

Jade:    [17:03] We talked a lot about that.

 

Josh:    [17:04] I feel like you’re right, man. It’s about creating more of an emotional bandwidth between the two archetypes and saying, you know what, there’s moments where I’m going to be a warrior, I’m going to be the strong, silent type, and there’s moments when I’m going to sit there and just hold space for my woman as she processes, and then I’m going to process with her. And I think it’s this really… it’s a sharpening of an intuitive sword as to what category we go into when we’re with a female partner. I think that’s really the awareness of are we being intuitive to go to the soft type, or are we going to be the strong type. I think it’s a combo of both.

 

Jade:    [17:38] Yeah, I love you used the term when we were talking before, you said intuitive vulnerability. And I like the idea of that because then it’s basically like you’re – I don’t like the idea of your default is to always be unloading and being vulnerable and being open – because sometimes, that’s inappropriate. We need to be, as men, flexible in that regard. And honestly, I feel like these men have existed always. You know what it reminds me of? Tell me what you think of this, but it reminds me of the charisma idea. The idea that we know in research what are the attributes of charisma. Charisma is power, it’s presence, and it’s warmth. I feel like if we look at a charismatic male, that charismatic male who exhibits power, presence, and warmth all together, which is not easy to do, that’s the kind of guy that I’m talking about. It’s not all power all the time and I’m just going to beat you and win, and it’s not all warmth all the time just to fit in, but it’s all of those. I think if you take your term, intuitive vulnerability, I think… or boundary heavy vulnerability, meaning that I’ll be available to be vulnerable with you, but I also have my boundaries and where I will go and where I won’t go, and also being empathetic and understanding enough to know when to be a particular way as a man is really what we’re talking about. That’s a lot for maybe a young man to sort of pick up on, and it’s a lot for even a guy my age, you know, in his 40s to kind of master. But I think it starts with the new alpha male, from my perspective, is the authentic male. So, wherever you lie on that spectrum, just be your authentic self, and then work on these power, presence, warmth principles, because we can all benefit. If we want to do our job and make a difference, that’s how we need to be to connect with other humans.

 

Josh:    [19:40] Also, there’s an evolution of what it means to be a woman and the feminine energy, like in the world there’s a massive evolution of that right now. And I feel like that evolution has yielded a certain demand for a performance of the masculine, right? I even said this term before, like women want more now than ever a spiritual superman. They want a man who can have sex with them, take out the garbage, pay the bills, hold space, be there, be emotionally vulnerable and write them poetry. Yeah, we can do all these things, but we’re not going to be perfect. Yet, this uprising of the feminine where now you see women in greater positions of power, and women are able to express themselves, and the dynamics of marriage and sexuality. Like, Jade, shit’s changing so fast. Things are up-leveling so fast. So, right now, that spiritual superman, I feel like we’re all kind of putting on a cape in a way. This is what it senses to me in the single community; like, you’re single too. You’re dating. What’s your sense on that? What’s your sense on the spiritual superman?

 

Jade:    [20:38] Well, I think, rightly so, that women would want that, and because I do – I consider myself a feminist, and I think women have been playing the spiritual female superwoman for a very long time now. Careers, family, managing everything. Even managing orgasms in the bedroom. They manage their own orgasm, and they manage their man’s orgasm so he can feel like he’s done something. Women are in charge of all of this stuff. They’re managing all the emotions. Of course, they want a guy to step up and be like, I’m doing a lot, I expect you to begin doing a lot as well. You know what I mean? And I think that – so, then if we go okay, well, men, should we be pushing to be supermen, our best selves in that regard? Yes, we should, but we also have to be able to be compassionate with ourselves and realize that we’re going to fail at this job a lot. But yeah, I do think that we should be reaching for that. I think that we should be doing our 4 jobs really well as men. I feel like we should be pushing our spiritual, mental, emotional growth. I think we should be being open and communicative as much as possible. And not forgetting, and this is the hard part, that the power principle of male still needs to be honored. I think that’s the part, potentially, that we miss. I mean, superman, that idea that I can be strong is critical. I think if we lose that, dude, that, to me, is the critical element of men. And by the way, I think it’s the critical element of women too, by the way. Women have – the male strength is slightly different than the female strength, but they are both immensely powerful and strong. And I think we’ve undervalued the female strength and we’ve overvalued the male strength. Now, just ‘cause we’ve done that, I don’t think that we should just then give up on the male strength. It’s important.

 

Josh:    [22:33] Look at Clark Kent. Clark Kent was Superman, but in his day life, he was like attentive and listening, and he was compassionate. He was attuned to the partner – what was her name? Lois Lane?

 

Jade:    [22:43] Yep, yep. Exactly.

 

Josh:    [22:44] So, that is actually a beautiful archetype, and you and I in your living room, man, we talked about the hero’s journey. You know, separation, initiation, and return. I feel like, as a collective, men and women together, we’re all together experiencing the return on a hero’s journey. I think humanity right now is on a leg of the hero’s journey. Like, we had – think about what happened with – this is a big, high conceptual view – think about what happened with the Holocaust and women’s suffrage and racism. We went through a nasty initiation as a species. Now, we’ve come around full circle and we’re trying to figure out what did we actually learn, you know, as a species. I feel like we’re at such a powerful time right now and people aren’t honoring the time we’re actually in. We have so much abundance, dude. Look at what we’re doing! We’re on a roof deck recording a podcast. This is the times that we live in. What’s your sense on where we are in the hero’s journey? Because I think this relates to the masculine/feminine potential polarity.

 

Jade:    [23:37] No, I actually love that you brought that up. I think we’re at a tenuous time actually, in my opinion. I agree with you that we are-

 

Josh:    [23:44] You think we’re still in the initiation?

 

Jade:    [23:46] No, no. I think we’ve made the loop and we’re coming around. But you know like, through the hero’s journey, you have this sort of lightning strike moment where everything changes. We’ve kind of had that. You alluded to that. But then there’s this key insight that happens at the end of this journey that allows the thing to complete. That key insight, I think we’re just now understanding, which is essentially this: for example, and I know a lot of my – you know, because I live in two worlds. I live in Los Angeles, and then I live in North Carolina.

 

Josh:    [24:16] You got the hippies and the hard workers.

 

Jade:    [24:18] I got the hippies and the blue-collar good ol’ boys, who are like – so, I get from both sides. What I think is important is that we get the lessons we need. As a matter of fact, a lot of people – Trump is an example, right? We’re talking right now, this episode, Donald Trump is our President. Trump, to me, represents are we going to get the key insight, because he represents the old way, and the backlash that always happens when we try to level up. Anytime we try to level up as a person or through humanity, what happens is there’s a lot of growth that comes with that. I look at Donald Trump is trying, people like that, and that whole world is trying to hold back that growth. And every time we level up, you’ll have a whole group of people trying to hold us back. We need to push forward, and I hope we do. We will regardless.

 

Josh:    [25:06] We will.

 

Jade:    [25:07] We will regardless, but that’s why I hesitate to say where we’ve made the big difference, because I think Trump and that whole cadre of individuals tends to want to hold back progress. We have to keep moving forward.

 

Josh:    [25:22] Yeah. And as we move forward, there’s tons of lessons that are going to come up. We live in a time where we’ve never been so connected. Yet, also man, we’re so disconnected. We were talking about this last night. There are people who have affluent lifestyles, and that can kind of manage polyamory, and do all these explorative practices when it comes to relationships; but it’s also because they just have less to lose. The family unit now, the lessons that we’re learning as this collective unfolds, the family unit now is so different from how it was designed. Back in the day, 2000 years ago, we might’ve been able to help out, and raise kids in a village, and have multiple partners, because we were all there. We live in apartment complexes. We’re in the jungle, dude. We’re in the concrete jungle here. So, it’s not designed that way anymore, and I think there’s a relearning of what it means to be in relationship, one of your pillars. This is a massive learning curve just on its own. I mean, dude, the 4 pillars you’ve built, there could be schools for this, for each one of the pillars. How do you see the relationship one unfolding in events that you might do, or will you bring in people to talk about relationship and these dynamics as they change?

 

Jade:    [26:30] I’ll definitely bring in people. It’s one of the things that you and I had talked about. And by the way, one of the things I love about – and I think any of you who follow Josh – one of the things you’ll love about him is you’re always very nuanced. The idea that you’re like, yeah, that worked then, but I’m not so sure it works now. To me, those are all the questions that we need to be asking. That’s the first thing that I’ll say about that. The second thing I’ll say is that we have to, for me personally, I used to teach everything. Now, what I want to do is bring in individuals because I’m not perfect at these things. Like, I’m an expert in maybe health and fitness and teaching. I’m not an expert in that for myself. I could teach that in a university setting, yes. But can I teach finance? Well, I can teach internet business, the earning. But I can’t teach saving and managing because I’m trying to figure that out myself. I can teach personal relationships because it’s something I’ve studied, but purpose and meaning? That’s a little bit tougher because it’s very individualized for individuals. But I see these events being – it’s kind of like, you know, you and I talked about doing one together soon. I see these things as being centered on we’re going to bring you in and talk about mainly finances, but we’re going to touch briefly on these other three because this thing doesn’t exist by itself. The event will essentially have some of those elements there, but it will be mainly finance. Or we’re going to focus on mainly personal development, purpose, and meaning, but these other elements are going to be there. The other thing that I think is really interesting is, that what I want to do, is instead of lecturing people – like, I told you about the Next Level Man event that we did in Cabo, Mexico, where we actually took people out and said what kind of man is it that you want to be. We had them write honor codes, and then rather than sit there and talk about it, they had to go out into Cabo, the city, and do what we call fear PRs, where they basically had to go through a series of challenges and gauntlets together as a group, but each person had to be the thing that they said and committed to being in that event. There’s something that happens when you get to see yourself be the thing in the world. Your brain has to get in alignment very quickly. I’m one of these people, it’s in psychology research, called the as-if principle; so, you basically be the thing so that you can become the thing. You don’t think the thing. That will work, but it takes much longer. You just start being it, almost like a method actor. So, I want these events, I would love to have something; or even if it’s not my event, or your event, somebody doing an event where you actually get to show up and be the thing, not just talk about being the thing.

 

Josh:    [29:07] I love this because last year I think you posted something and I was like, “I love this, Jade!” And it was be it until you see it, don’t fake it until you make it. That hit me hard because I thought there’s so much truth in that. The statement of fake it until you make it, it’s starting with the word fake. Look at the etymology of the words we’re using. Fake until you make? That doesn’t feel in alignment for me. Be until I see, yeah. Because, man, our current reality – if I close my eyes, and I continue to visualize, and I continue to focus on what it is that I want – it’s only a matter of time before that happens. In 2015, I had a dream of having a podcast. I had a dream of reaching a million people on a podcast. And that has happened.

 

Jade:    [29:50] I know, it’s crazy.

 

Josh:    [29:51] That has happened!

 

Jade:    [29:52] It’s crazy you got a million downloads, dude.

 

Josh:    [29:54] So, that has happened because I put my intention behind it, and you know what? I knew it was possible. I knew in my heart is was possible. And so I said, you know what, I’m just going to do. I’m going to be a podcaster. I’m going to learn whatever I need to learn. I’m going to travel. I’m going to experience whatever growth I need to experience to be until I see it. And here we are seeing it. So, where did you get that from? Because you were the first person I ever heard that said that.

 

Jade:    [30:18] Yeah, no. I think that’s an original thing, if anything’s truly original. It’s definitely something that I started saying, and the reason why is because same thing as you, something about faking doesn’t seem right. People, often times, when they hear that, they say, ok, but what’s the difference between faking and being; and to me, it’s very interesting. You can go through the world and be pretending you’re something you’re not. Let’s say you’re pretending – you want to be a health fitness coach, let’s say. That’s your thing. And you look out there and you see Jade Teta doing something like that, or you see Josh Trent doing something like that, and you start emulating everything that they’re doing. Showing up when the lights are on you, you look the part. But when the lights are off you, you’re out doing anything but. You’re watching Netflix reruns-

 

Josh:    [31:06] You’re snorting cocaine.

 

Jade:    [31:07] You’re snorting cocaine. You’re doing anything but the thing, so you’re not. That’s the difference. Being it is that you wake up, and you’re living it, and you go to bed and you’re still living it. It might not be showing up yet, but you love it. You eat, breathe, sleep it. You’re reading research. You’re doing all the things, even when no one’s watching. Faking it is like you’re looking out there and trying to duplicate what other people are doing, but you don’t feel it, you eat it, you don’t breathe it, you don’t sleep it, you’re not living it. And that’s the difference.

 

Josh:    [31:36] Yeah, and we have to be careful too, because right now we’re in an industry where coaches are coaching coaches to coach coaches on how to coach other coaches.

 

Jade:    [31:41] Exactly!

 

Josh:    [31:42] It’s fucking crazy right now, and I think it’s easy for people that have good hearts, that want to create impact in the world, to fall prey to this coaching model, because they’re sold a dream that is it doesn’t matter if you’re not certified, it doesn’t matter if you’re not qualified, just move forward and fake it ‘til you make it. At some point it’s like, hold on, someone gets to actually unfold the learning and lessons in their specific lane of genius. Over time, cultivate that experience and knowledge, and then go out and sell a product or a service. How do you feel about this paradigm we’re seeing with the coaches that coach coaches that coach other coaches?

 

Jade:    [32:16] To me, I go, are you – again, actually I’ve give you some – I won’t name names here with people, but I’ve had several friends who have been like I want do what you do, or I want to be in relationship coaching, or I want do - and I, as being a friend, and being someone who prides himself on loving and also being honest, I just go, they’re like, “What do you think?” And I go, honestly, I love anyone chasing their dream, and I don’t actually see you reading books on relationships and going and getting coaching certifications and taking your own certifications on conscious relationships or this continued education. That’s the difference. People who fake it ‘til they make it end up being fakers; people who be it ‘til they see it end up actually being the thing because they would do it for free anyway. I have this other construct - I think you and I have talked about – but there’s this idea of base level human, culture level human, and next level human. Well, a culture level human is some who everything they do is based on how they will be seen by the world. So, fake it until you make it is a culture level meme. It’s basically like, I’m going to do it and look like you, even though I may not have any expertise. That’s when you’re stuck in culture level, you’re still sort of an adolescent in mindset. In order to go to the next phase, where you’re talking about, to actually be an expert, you have to adapt to the next level mindset, where you’re like, I’m going to be it until I see it. I’m going to learn, I’m going to educate, I’m going to follow, I’m going to chase, I’m going to do this. And honestly, the way it looks to the outside world is secondary. Because sometimes, you and I know, the way it looks to the outside world is ‘who the hell does this person think they are?’ It’s the who does this person think they are effect. Culture level people quit because they can’t stand being seen as anything but successful and wonderful and good. Next level people are often times out of that. They’re often times – they have to go through the phase of being disliked. Actually, talk about Adlerian psychology again, Adler has one of my favorite things. He goes, we humans must develop the courage to be disliked. That is part of our maturity process. That’s what gets us out of this culture level construct of the idea of faking, because faking is how it looks to you. Being is how it looks to me.

 

Josh:    [34:43] Oh, I love this, man, because when I get comments on YouTube – the negative stuff, like the really hurtful stuff – so, somebody will say, just last week this dude was like, why is a fat guy doing health and fitness content?

 

Jade:    [34:55] I’ve gotten the same kind of talk.

 

Josh:    [34:57] I was like, you know what, that’s a sign that I’m doing the right thing because it affected this person so much. They had to listen, they had to be there, they had to write the comment, they had to push enter, and you know they came back around to look at it. So, in my mind, it’s like, if I’m getting hatred or if I’m getting vitriol, that means I’m on the right path. It’s evidence, dude. It’s evidence that I’m on the right path. I feel like a big part of this for me, and for a lot of people, is this concept of the flinch. People don’t want to share their dreams because they’re afraid of the flinch. You know, it’s like, if I share my dream then I might get haters, or I might get hurt. But like you said, the level of the human, if I’m in that – what was the level of it again?

 

Jade:    [35:33] Culture level.

 

Josh:    [35:34] If I’m in the culture level human, that’s a totally different game. I’m in a certain level of where I am, so can I just be honest of where I am. A friend of mine, just recently she was like, “I don’t know what I’m going to do on my YouTube channel. I have no idea what I’m going to talk about, but I know I want to do it.” I was like, great, start with that video. Start with the video of you saying here’s what I’m interested in, here’s what I’m passionate about, here’s what I want to create impact in the world for, and you know what, here’s my honesty about where I am. That’s so inspiring, dude. It’s so inspiring compared to if someone says I’m 21 years old, I’m a certified life coach, I’m a master in NLP and blah, blah, blah. That’s not trustable. That’s the whole fake it ‘til you make it. This is why I loved asking you about be it ‘til you see it.

 

Jade:    [36:12] And ask yourself this – all of us should ask ourselves this – that person who’s wanting to put out that video, are they more concerned with looking like they’re influencing the world or actually influencing the world? Because let me – I just want to throw this out at you and get your take on this, and all of you listening, get your take on this – because, to me, I go, my father, and my older brother Keoni, and actually, my two older brothers – these people have no social network, no influence, they don’t want to be on social networks - but when they interact with people 1:1, they make a huge impact for people. They look for opportunities to serve people, from the person who needs help carrying their groceries to the car to the person in line who they share a laugh with, to the person in their family who is going through a tough time with finances. These people, no one is ever going to comment, see, or anything like that on Instagram. Versus these other people who are like I want to influence the world, and they’re not doing anything on an individual level. They think influencing the world means I have to have numbers in social media. I go, honestly, if that’s really your goal, you start right now with the people in front of you. And yes, you put up the video, and you do those things too so you can have a wider reach, but that again is the difference between faking it and being it. Someone who’s really being it is looking for every opportunity to serve their fellow human 1:1, and they don’t care who’s watching, versus the people who’s I want to put up the video on YouTube just ‘cause I want a video channel, so that when people look, they can see that I got a video channel, and I got this many views, and I got this many followers. To me, that’s a faker. Now, there’s nothing wrong with that, by the way, because I think it’s part of our maturity.

 

Josh:    [37:55] It’s part of the evolution.

 

Jade:    [37:57] It’s part of the evolution of us. But, if you want to get to the next level and look at this next level way of being, you need to get out of that adolescent mindset. I look at like, base level humans, they’re kind of like children in a sense. They basically are all about give me, give me, give me, with no sort of understanding of consequences, until one day you steal my Tonka truck, you see me cry, your mirror neurons light up, and you give it back and say, oh, that might’ve not been a cool thing to do. That’s how we grow. Then, we get into this adolescent phase, and we’re trying to form teams and tribes and fit in with people. We want to be ‘I’m better than you and you’re not’, and we see this all the time in adults. Red vs. blue. Religious vs. non-religious.

 

Josh:    [38:39] Yes. Democrat vs. Republican.

 

Jade:    [38:41] All this stuff goes on. Those are all culture level constructs. A next level human goes beyond that and just goes hey, I just want to be the best human I can be with the people right across from me. And guess what? If I so happen – like you and I talk about this a lot – we’re incredibly lucky that we get to have people even give a shit what we say or talk about; but in the end, we both – and I know this about you, and I know this about myself – it’s more important to me that I show up with the people who I run into. At the server we just had, you know, lunch, to treat them with kindness, to leave a good tip, to say hello, to make a difference in people’s lives who we run into everyday. Again, that’s the difference. A next level human is not someone looking for accolades or reciprocation or acknowledgment. They’re doing it simply for themselves.

 

Josh:    [39:30] This is fascinating to me because I have a firm belief that we’ve touched on in our conversations, the law of attraction. I feel like the law of attraction really, in another way, is the law of reciprocity. The law of attraction, the law of reciprocity, they operate, in my opinion, on the same frequency, if you will, because if I’m doing something for someone and I don’t expect anything back, and I mean, really viscerally, don’t expect anything back, law of attraction is eventually going to bring that back to me in some way. I don’t care if you’re analytical or if you’re spiritual, those are laws that are in place. It’s kind of like the law of gravity. You drop something, it’s going to fall to the ground. I firmly believe on what you just said, where your brother was in the store and he was being nice to people, you and I were at the restaurant and we were being nice to people – we’re not doing that, posting it on Instagram so that we want accolades for being nice – we’re just doing it because that’s what our heart and soul is telling us, is guiding us to do in that moment. Alan Watts talked about this, where he said, it takes as long to do it as it does to record it. But then he said, well, who am I to be saying this because right now I’m being recorded. Hahaha and it was like this laughter. I love Alan Watts because he was so woke. He’s been one of my best deceased mentors ever.

 

Jade:    [40:37] For a long time, same.

 

Josh:    [40:38] He’s so intelligent, but it’s because he understood exactly what you’re talking about. I feel like there’s elements of Alan Watts in your work. Who else has shaped you? Who else has helped you create this Next Level Human? Because you’ve been digging into philosophy for like 3 years pretty heavy.

 

Jade:    [40:53] Alan Watts was, I think, instrumental in me really understanding Taoism. You know, you and I talk a lot about Taoism. He – because Taoism is one of those philosophies that’s tough to get a handle on, so people like Alan Watts was – he helped me understand - he wrote a book back called The Watercourse Way; I believe that was Alan Watts. It was instrumental in helping me understand Taoism. But if you want to know the people I’m most fascinated by, and I want to ask you the same question, the people I’m most fascinated by and have had the most impact on me – and in a sense, it’ll seem cliché, but hopefully I’ll explain to you why – but I would say someone like Muhammad Ali, Bruce Lee, the actor and philosopher and martial artist. Let’s just take them just for a minute, because then it dovetails into the male conversation. I feel like these two individuals represent the power, presence, and warmth that we were talking about. I think the other thing they represent is the idea of the next level human. They were both way ahead of their time. It’s funny, my dad talks about Muhammad Ali. He goes, “Jade, you have to understand, back then, we could not stand Muhammad Ali.” He was the first athlete talking and doing all the stuff, and over the course of time, he’s now one of my dad’s heroes. And because he was always on the right side of history, always a man of his convictions and always 1000%. But he also had humor and warmth about him, and playfulness and fun, and he illustrated all of those aspects of things. So, believe it or not, some of those iconic individuals are sort of – I follow their lives and their stories. But also, of course, the – I know you and I talk a lot about stoicism, Seneca, Marcus Aurelius – I read a lot of that, and I read a lot of philosophy. Immanuel Kant is someone I just got introduced to who I really look at. It’s really philosophers, and then these monumental, next level individuals in history. And I’m curious for you. Which ones sort of speak to you?

 

Josh:    [43:02] You know, I’ve been consuming a lot of Alan Watts over the past couple years specifically. And also too, I’ve really dove into just the lectures that are coming through from people like Bruce Lipton – I know you had a phase of your life where you went through a lot of Bruce Lipton – I’ve been reading, consuming a lot of Bruce Lipton, just understanding how legitimately emotional trauma resides in our tissues in the cells. Also, I’ve been reading a lot of Joe Dispenza lately.

 

Jade:    [43:29] Fantastic.

 

Josh:    [43:30] Yeah. Just understanding that we can become truly, and I have been, addicted to a thought pattern. I mean, just take that context and just really encapsulate it here. If I’m getting a result that I don’t want, am I also creating that result by being addicted to the fact that I don’t want the result, and do I get a rush in a way out of thinking in a certain path? So, those two, and honestly, I’ve been really loving some of the stuff that have come through around plant medicine, around Dennis McKenna, Terence McKenna-

 

Jade:    [44:02] Which you’re teaching me a lot about.

 

Josh:    [44:03] I’ve been watching a lot of Dennis and Terence McKenna lately. Although he did seem very fringe and kind of out there in his time, I think if Terence McKenna was alive right now, he would be able to share wisdom with a different microphone. In other words, we live in a world of technology and connection and social media, and I think he would’ve been able to be a lot more powerful if he lived now. So, I’ve been consuming a lot of his content recently. My Audible’s always filled with like Next Level Human books. Like things that are around money. I’ve been consuming a lot of Jen Sincero’s work, You’re a Badass at Making Money. I think she is a voice for conscious capitalism, making money from a place of service. Those are the people that are in my field right now, and I think, honestly man, the financial conversation, it is such a deep wound for so many people, but there’s a reason that it’s one of your core pillars. Without money, we have no oxygen, literally. The world we’ve created for one another, this capitalistic system, whether you can talk shit about it or not, it allows people to do what we’re doing. If we were in Communist countries, we wouldn’t be on a podcast. There’d be some dude behind us in a uniform censoring everything we say.

 

Jade:    [45:16] Yeah, it’s amazing.

 

Josh:    [45:17] But this 4th pillar, man, I’d love to get down into the weeds with you on this, because finance, for me, has been a constant evolutionary learning curve. It has been like one lesson after another, sometimes I’m hot, sometimes I’m cold. I know people feel this.

 

Jade:    [45:31] You know, this conversation goes into the fakers and be-er conversation again, because I think in our industry especially, there are a huge amount of fakers, unfortunately. Because money is one of these things that you can peacock with, and it’s especially true of men. I have taken it upon myself, because a lot of people look at me and they’re like, “Oh, Jade, you’ve started a business, you’ve sold a business, you must be a multimillionaire.” I like to be 1000% honest with my financial situation just so people – again, it’s being it. It’s just being the authentic self. I have struggled financially as well. I earn really well, but here’s what’s interesting that people don’t understand, is that we’re up here, we’re in Brentwood, we’re on a roof at my apartment complex in Brentwood.

 

Josh:    [46:15] It’s plush, you guys.

 

Jade:    [46:17] It’s plush, but here’s what people don’t understand. I have debt still. I still got student loans. It’s not like I’m sitting there with a million dollars in my bank account, right? That’s what people need to understand. I don’t – I’m not a millionaire. In order for me to get to that status, which is a goal of mine for several reasons – yes, the achievement aspect of it, but because you and I are both passionate about doing good, and giving, and we both do that-

 

Josh:    [46:42] It just requires money.

 

Jade:    [46:43] And this requires money. The more money I make, the more good I can do. For me, I may have figured out earning, but I haven’t figured out saving and managing. If I want to continue to live this lifestyle for myself, one, which I do, and two, be able to touch and help other people from family members to the person on the street to anybody, to charities, to everything else, I need to make big time money. So, one of the big switches for me, coming from a lower middle class sort of background, and then being able to earn was getting over, because you talked about getting stuck in these stories or these thought patterns.

 

Josh:    [47:20] Yes.

 

Jade:    [47:21] My story was that people with money were assholes, and they were essentially… this idea that the people with the money, they’re taking all our money, there’s the haves and the have-nots, and anyone who has millions of dollars is taking from someone else. Now, I look at that completely different. Now, I see most of the really wealthy people I know are also the most generous people I know. I know some sort of scumbags too, but most of them not. But, I’ve changed that story to money’s not the root of all evil, money is actually the root of all good. I can make a huge impact for good with money, more than just walking on the street and shaking people’s hands. I can make great impacts. I don’t know what it is for you. I’d like to hear your thoughts on that, but I think that’s what it is. Be honest where you are, know are you earning well, saving well, managing well. I’m earning really well, saving – no, managing – have not historically been good with that. I need to clean that up so that I can do good in the world with money vs. I’m not trying to get rich so I can have an Aston Martin, although that doesn’t mean I won’t buy one.

 

Josh:    [48:28] Sure.

 

Jade:    [48:29] Because that’s part of it as well. But I want lots of money so I can do lots of good and live a plush life. It’s both!

 

Josh:    [48:36] Man, my sense on money’s energy, to me, is that money is a direct mirror and representation of how honest I’m being about myself and how much I love myself, not from a place of cockiness or boisterousness. If I love myself and I believe in what I’m putting out into the world, that’s an energetic statement. Like, I believe that what I’m creating will serve a million people. I believe what I’m creating will really truly help people where they need it the most. Well, then, the universe is going to give me back that same energy. I’m going to get back what I put out. Might not be in the timeline I want. It might not be right away in a week, or a month, or even a year, but eventually. And I’m feeling this now, like the momentum of money. My money story was that – I even did a talk Sean Croxton’s Mastermind 3-4 years ago – and my talk was Speak Your Truth; and at the very beginning of the talk, I was like, at a early age, based on the work that I’ve done, I created some beliefs. And these have been like a broken record that have played for a long time. What I found out was that people that make money are out to get me, money causes pain – that was the big one – the big one for my subconscious was money causes pain, people can’t be trusted, expect the worst to happen. These were 3 things that, from my childhood, were super deeply ingrained, like a cattle being prodded, you know, like branded. So, I’ve unpacked these over the past 3-4 years specifically, and even more in the past 2 years in plant medicine, which I’ve shared with you, like these incredible belief systems that were built on just early childhood trauma. If we’re all being really honest here, most people are wounded about money from childhood, which projects and rules their subconscious and conscious life as adults.

 

Jade:    [50:11] Yeah.

 

Josh:    [50:12] We’re all ruled by these programs and stories anyways. So, my story, the old one, was that money causes pain. Think about that. If I believe that money causes pain, I’m going to do everything I can to sabotage myself from acquiring it. That was my story for a long time. This, even in reading Sincero’s book and just hanging out with good friends like you, I see that wealth is a tool for serving people. So, who am I to not share my gift? I’m even feeling the love and the joy about money right now just talking to you. Of course, I’m calling in money now, because I know that money doesn’t cause pain. And before, I used to fake it ‘til I made it. There was a time when I interviewed money experts on the show and I’d say, yeah, money’s just energy, but I didn’t actually feel it in my body when I said it. I was just saying it because I thought I needed to say it.

 

Jade:    [50:56] And I think the final – so, there’s a whole idea, if I was going to break down money for people the way I see it – it’s just what you said. The first thing is changing those underlying stories. For some reason, I don’t know why people don’t get that. We certainly understand that if our parents had a bad relationship, we may end up bringing some of that into our romantic relationships. It’s exactly the same with money.

 

Josh:    [51:13] Shocker.

 

Jade:    [51:14] Yeah. If people, for some reason – we get that, no duh – for some reason we forget that money’s the same way. If we have a bad relationship, and come up with bad relationships, and lack or beliefs about money, we will carry those forward too. So, getting over those beliefs. Then, there’s 2 other things that you have to do. The next piece is, you have to ask for it, which is, I imagine, tough for people like you and me and a lot of people who are - because as teachers, and if people who want to make a difference and want to help -  one of the ruts that we get into, all of us, is we go, I’m the helper; I’m not the person who needs help; I’m the helper. Just like a teacher has to be a student first, if you want to make money and help people, you have to take help as well. So, you have to be able to ask for money. How many people have problems asking for a raise, or ask for any help, or taking any help from people? I know it seems weird, but that, again, is a block to money.

 

Josh:    [52:14] Jade, what you just said is so powerful, man, because think about when people receive compliments or push them away. It’s the same thing. So, I’m in a relationship or a friendship, and I go, “Your dress looks beautiful today. I’m so happy to be around you. You give me such great energy. You look amazing today.” She or he might say, “Oh, really,” like they don’t receive the compliment. I think there’s a complete connected paradigm with people that can’t receive compliments, and also can’t receive money, and can’t receive help. It’s almost, really, if we break it down, man, don’t you think this is truly at the bedrock about belief in oneself and self-worthiness?

 

Jade:    [52:50] Yes! Absolutely I do.

 

Josh:    [52:52] That’s what this is all about. It’s fractalized, but at the core of it, that’s kind of the paradigm that’s shifting or not shifting.

 

Jade:    [52:56] And we can have the same conversation in all 4 jobs – health and fitness, personal relationship, finance, and purpose and meaning. It’s all the same thing. With money in particular, it is very telling. Like, we just went to lunch. Let’s say you pick up the tab, or I pick up the tab. How many people do you know like, “Oh, no, no, no,” vs. just be like, “You know what? I so appreciate that. Thank you.” It’s as simple as that as you come around money. I just assigned my first employee agreement. I haven’t been an employee in forever. And I asked – they said, “What do you want?” And like, this is what I need, and I got it. But I would never have gotten it – they’re not going to volunteer, by the way. No one – very rarely is somebody going to be like I’m going to give you exactly what you’re worth – because they don’t know. They’re looking at your from the outside. You have to be the one that says wait, here is what I am worth. If you want to work backwards from there, that’s fine, but you have to ask. And then, I’m on the third stage of managing money. I’ve been able to – I’ve the earning down and the money story. I’ve now began to learn to ask and accept and get that dynamic down. And the last piece is just the skills required, the wisdom, around money. What is the best way to save, how to set up IRAs, how to, you know, should I put my money in a 401k, should I invest in these particular stocks, should I put money aside for an investment in a new business, all of those. How should I structure my income? What should I do with a savings account? All that’s the next stage. So, we need all 3 of those for money, but to your point, it is self-worth in all of these areas. It is – as we grow in maturity, we often times will grow in these areas automatically, but not always, because we have to be conscious about it.

 

Josh:    [54:38] I have this explanation of intelligence, because on Wellness Force, Jade, we always talk about – we’re all discovering this physical and emotional intelligence together. I feel like, when it comes to intelligence, and people have heard me say this before, but it exactly relates to where we are, but there’s a gathering phase. This where like, we go to school, we go to the courses, we get the pdfs, we get the books. Like, so many people have libraries full of books and certifications. Then, after the gathering phase, there’s the application. It’s like, alright, I’m going to go to the gym, I’m going to try these certain periodization tables, I’m going to do the workout programs, I’m going to try the food, I’m going to talk to my partner, I’m going to be “vulnerable”, I’m going to learn what that decision making faculty is around being vulnerable. Then, the third phase, which we all don’t even need to explain, we just feel it when we’re around certain people, is the embodiment phase. You know, the gather, the apply, the embody – we’re all on our way to embodiment or not, and I think sometimes people will sabotage themselves to getting to embodiment because there’s a lack of self-worth. There’s something missing, that even though they’ve gathered and they’ve applied, to make that transition, to make that, really, it’s a leap of – it’s not a leap of faith, but it’s a leap of something – it’s like a leap of belief that one is worthy and one is loved. I think what happens in the gathering and the application phase is people tend to get stuck. They get stuck in, well, I just need one more cert. I was there before I just pulled the trigger last week to go, you know what, I’m coming out with the breathwork.io, I’m coming out with the course. I don’t need to be perfect anymore. Every lesson that I speak about is a lesson that I’m potentially learning myself. I think we’re all like that. What do you think about intelligence though? It’s not about people being smart. What does intelligence mean to you?

 

Jade:    [56:21] No, I love the framework you just broke down. I love that framework. I’ll probably steal it from you. It’s really, really good.

 

Josh:    [56:26] We’re going to borrow from one another.

 

Jade:    [56:28] Exactly. One of the things I’ll say about that is, ok, so I agree on everything you said, so I won’t add necessarily to the intelligence, because I do think it’s that. Real quick, it’s like, ok, information, then turning information into usable stuff is knowledge. Then, the practical application of that knowledge in the real world, with experience, is wisdom. So, I do think when I look at knowledge and information, I think it’s a trajectory to wisdom; but then I think you get to the place where you talked about, and I’ll give you another distinction I make, because I do think distinctions matter. The reason people get stuck is because when you talk about the leap, right, this is what we do, and this is partly how ideas evolve – we have this belief that leap and the net will appear. At least, it’s not actually a belief, but I think it’s just a saying, and people understand – just hear me out on this, because I think people will resist me because they’ve heard this over and over again – they probably agree with that statement. I adamantly disagree with that statement. Here’s why: leap and the net will appear. We all know and can point to one, two, three examples with ourselves or other people we know, where we left, or they left, and the net never did appear.

 

Josh:    [57:37] Yeah, they ate shit.

 

Jade:    [57:38] Therefore, we go, oh, leap and the net will appear – it sounds good, it makes a good meme, but the truth of the matter is a lot of times when you leap, you’re going to bust your ass and it’s going to be a disaster. So, I say let’s amend that, and let’s say, leap and weave the net as we fall. That’s essentially what we’re doing, right? That’s the whole thing where it’s like, that is the distinction. So, when we have these sayings – another one saying that I know people will get mad at me with this one as well – but I just say, just try it on. And maybe I’m wrong, but just try it on. The other one is, everything happens for a reason. I go, no, things happen and you make a reason. Everything, you know, because think about it – if you say everything happens for a reason, that basically puts everything out of your control, so no wonder you feel anxious. You’re hoping, well, I’ll wait my whole life to figure out why that happened for a reason. To me, I think those distinctions keep us stuck. It’s not leap and the net will appear. It’s leap and weave the net as you fall. It’s not everything happens for a reason; it’s things happen and you make a reason. And these stories that we’re telling ourselves are a lot of what keeps us stuck, so you with your course you’re going to launch, and I went through this as well – the best thing that we would teach people now is - I would just be like, you need to pull the trigger. It’s not ready, fire, aim, or whatever, or ready, aim, fire; it’s ready, fire, aim. So, people go, ready, ready, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, and then finally they fire. When I say no, it’s fire, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, now you’re ready.

 

Josh:    [59:12] Yes.

 

Jade:    [59:13] You know, and that’s how it really works.

 

Josh:    [59:14] And I have this sense too that when it comes to wanting to aim perfectly, that’s actually the ego trying to stop somebody from getting hurt or being seen as not perfect.

 

Jade:    [59:23] Yeah.

 

Josh:    [59:24] I mean, that’s a big part of it. How much of the perfection paradigm holds people back from ever having their dreams fulfilled? I mean, that’s probably one of the biggest fucking sabotage units of the ego that’s out there.

 

Jade:    [59:34] Perfection is a cultural level human construct. Next level humans don’t think about perfection because they know it doesn’t exist. Only cultural level humans do that. So, again, we talk about faking it vs. being it, perfection is a faking it mindset. People who are being it know that is messy, sloppy, imperfect.

 

Josh:    [59:56] Yeah, and honestly, man, I don’t want to be perfect anymore. Like, I don’t care about being famous or known. I was having a conversation with somebody last week and they were like, so what’s your dream? And I said, my ultimate dream is to reach 1 million people a month, because I trust that if I’m reaching a million people a month, then I know that the universe is going to give me everything back in surplus of what I need. They were like, oh, so you want to have a bunch of followers and you want to have all this attention on you, and I was like, nope. I could give a shit about people knowing who I am or being on some pedestal. All I really want is just to have meaning in my life, and to know when I leave the planet that I left something that my children, or that some people are going to carry on. Because you know what, dude? If there’s not people like you, Jade, if there’s not someone like me that just wants to leave some kind of a seed that’s going to grow into something that actually serves people, the darkness will take over. I mean, we’re in the devil’s fucking playground here, man. There’s a lot of negativity in this world. I think sometimes people see people that want to be of service, or that want to be a next level human, as being cocky or self-righteous, or self-serving, but it’s just because that’s the vibration that they’re looking at it from. It’s a totally different vantage point for them.

 

Jade:    [01:01:04] I’ll share something with you that’s really interesting. I’m embarrassed to share it in one sense, and I also just want to share it because it makes sense. Cultural level individuals – when I was mostly in culture level, I would see maybe Josh – not you, but someone on YouTube doing their thing, and I’d get this – and check in with yourself, because I think we all get this, it’s very human – I’d get this thing about who the hell they think they are. I’d get this hit like, they think they’re cocky, or they think they’re somebody, and it would get under my skin in a sense. That’s because I was coming at it from a very cultural level, adolescent standpoint. Do you know that I, honestly, can proudly say now I simply do not feel that anymore. I see somebody on YouTube, on Instagram, anyone out there trying to speak and serve, and I am just, damn, good for you, go do your thing. At the same time I’m like, you know, I will offer any assistance I can, and I am willing to teach and learn anywhere I can because I do agree, there is something that happens with some people where they get stuck and don’t want to perfect their craft and become true experts. But again, those are fakers. Those are people who just want to look the part, not actually be the part. But I am so supportive now. I just don’t get that, I don’t get that hater vibe in me at all anymore. And when I see other haters doing that, I just go it’s just a level of human they’re at. They’re still in that adolescent mindset.

 

Josh:    [01:02:22] Well, man, I’d like to stack on what you just said because I think there was a part of me that used to judge people that were putting out content as well. Actually, if I’m being even more honest, it’s because there was that part of myself that didn’t want to be judged by me. If I were to put out the video or the content that I didn’t think was perfect, a.k.a. the person I was judging for doing it… that’s probably the top reason why I haven’t put out more, or why I haven’t put out what I really want to because the judger in myself was judging myself for ever wanting to create it. I mean, that’s real shit.

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